woman-510480_640Who has the last word- the final say- me or God?

Do I believe what I think, see, understand and can wrap my created mind around? OR Do I believe what God -The Creator- says?

Writing this question down reveals how ridiculous it actually is!  Of course God should and Does have the last word, the final say, the ultimate Truth.  The key is – I don’t always live and think like I really believe this Truth.

I get tangled up in my own thoughts, perceptions, story and understandings and let them be the louder or the last word when I look at difficult circumstances, battle the shame or lies in my head.  I am sad to say, that I often listen to my words more than God’s word and can suck the life and hope right out of me.

There was a time when, I was in counseling dealing with the impact of being sexually abused as a child and again as a teen; (both times by nonfamily members) I felt damaged, dirty, shame-filled, beyond hope and healing, unworthy of love.  I was convinced I was fatally flawed, and forever broken.

I was struggling and hanging on by my fingernails, desperate to believe God is good and loving.  These were dark days, when I doubted God’s goodness, love, faithfulness – and questioned everything I knew about God -my faith was on the rocks!

With the help of a wise therapist, a loving and patient husband, and faithful friends, I walked, crawled, cried, clawed my way along the long road of healing.

I found some hope in two  CD’s of Scripture set to music. They* were the only Bible I opened for a long while…

And slowly…my heart, mind and soul began to heal as I choose to speak God’s Truth instead of letting the lies live and take root in my mind and heart. She Speaks Truth became my mantra.

4-isaiah-53-5-crppdThis image captured me today -I paused and asked myself, “Do I really believe this?  Not in an eternal salvation sense only, but in a day to day, life changing difference making way??

While I spent years working through healing, and embrace the freedom I live in today, I continue to wrestle with lies.

Insecurities rear their head like gale force winds. Shame roars with demeaning words, thoughts of futility and I struggle to cling to what I know to be true, no matter how I might feel in the moment.

Even still… years later I have to work at who will have the last word… me or God.

Can you relate?  Do the words you speak to yourself bring life, hope, possibility, or death, despair and defeat?

What we speak to ourselves -meaning thoughts that run around in our head – needs to go through the filter of God’s word.

To change this hope killing habit, we must be willing to replace our last word with God’s Final Word.

Do you say any of these “last words” to yourself? Read what God says in reply – and if you are really brave, read God’s words out loud.

  1. I am unlovable.  God says,  “I have loved you with an Everlasting love.”
  2. I am flawed.  God says, “You are fearfully and wonderfully made, a redeemed sinner, not a flawed failure.”
  3. I will never get over this angers, anxiety, depression or ____.  God says, I have not given you a spirit of fear, but of Power, Love and Self Discipline. (2 Tim 1:7)
  4. I live in fear with no way out.  God says, “Fear not, I AM with you.” 365 times in the Bible God says Fear Not!
  5. I have gone too far, done too much to ever be forgiven, made whole and healed.   God says, “By His wounds, we are healed.” Isa 53: 5

Friends, God has spoken the Word, and the WORD became flesh and lived with us in all our mess, chaos, joy, delight, love and sinfulness.

We are not beyond hope.  Jesus came that we might be redeemed, healed, whole and not just for eternity with God, but for a rich and meaningful life here on earth as God’s precious loved one. It is hard to wrap our minds around this Truth- but True it is!

We can choose to put God’s work in our mind and heart and dwell on it.  She Reads Truth- Day 32

We can choose to speak the truth to ourselves rather than our jumbled up but oh so believable lies.  Let’s try together… I will … will you?

Daily, moment by moment, let’s try to catch ourselves and replace our last words with God’s Final Word.

Together we grow,

susie

 

PS. Those CD’s were  The Life, by Michael Card .  They had an incredible and life changing impact on my life. In them I found my faith and discovered much about the God who loves me.  Years later, I got to share with Michael how God used him and his music to save my faith.

One Response to “Who has the last word?”

  1. Linda

    Thank you, Susie, for your willingness to share your pain and suffering. You should never doubt your courage in putting words to the horrors you have faced. I can hardly imagine the shame and self doubt you have endured and continue to endure with the recurring illnesses.
    There is this voice in my heart that tells me when it is time to discontinue giving power to my past actions, inactions or the actions or inactions of others. It tells me that words give power and should no longer be spoken, especially out loud unless their calling out is necessary to help another. Not the same as just stuffing the words, but literally erasing them because they no longer have validity in your life. I might have failed to be patient, but today I am patient in God’s grace. I may not have been totally truthful, but today, with God’s grace, I speak honestly. I may have disappointed another or been disappointed, but today, with God’s grace, I am and have forgiven. Being forgiven, there is no reason to dredge up the pain or the failure, because it is no longer mine.
    I have come to know that voice in my heart as the Holy Spirit. When I listen and obey, I am healed. When my thoughts are too loud for the Holy Spirit’s voice to be heard, I miss the urging. But, God abides in me, and always sends the message again.
    I abide in Him and He abides in me. (from John 15:4) And, so, I endure.
    Blessings.

    Reply

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