Truth and Dare: I struggle in relationships too!
It’s true! I have struggles,hurts, failings and fallings in my relationships! I don’t always take my own advice. I can be bossy, argumentative, impatient, slow to listen and quick to speak! I have made relationship messes and fallen hard.
- The hurt and sorrow are brutal.
- The desire to hide in shame is strong and irresistible at times. I have hidden.
- The pull to fight back, or dismiss or criticize the one who hurt me whisper seductively- and I am tempted to give in and be self protective…
I have fallen, failed, and been un-brave in my relationships. Being brave when it means more hurt and disappointment scares me. I would rather pretend.
Then I remember that to be authentic in my work, means being brave in my own life and relationships.
Then I read Rising Strong, by Brene Brown….and this quote speaks to me and emboldens me to Dare – to be Brave!
- When you read this quote from Brene Brown–
- What falling stories comes to mind?
- What being brave stories show how you dared!!
- How have you felt your way back up?
…Me?
Falling story of EPIC proportions: major relationship tension with my daughter in her early 20’s
Daring to be Brave: I named it with her and told her it hurt me too…
Feeling my way back up… Patience, tears, avoidance, blamed her, me, the hubs!
Took time to be honest with myself that it may never get better
Tried harder
Gave her permission -in my mind and heart- to be distant, disappointed and angry.
Stopped trying so hard
More patience
Conversations- hard ones, Angry ones, sorrowful ones
Tears
Apologies
Heart wrenching sadness
Prayer
Letting go….
Not taking my hurt out on her- or at least trying not to do so.
Having Faith
Trying again- with some grace and wisdom
Time…
Worth it- as we are closer now and enjoy each other and have good, deep meaningful conversations! Some of the Best parts of this grueling Journey!!
I can’t wait till she comes home for the holidays! (There were times neither of us did- if I am being brutally honest)
And….Last week in the middle of a tough time for her- she called and said- “I just want to be home with you.”
SOOO WORTH the unfolding story of our growing mom daughter friendship!
I struggle in my relationships too… and helping folks create better relationships is my life’s work. So take heart! Dive in and Dare Greatly!! Then feel your way back up when you falter and fail- because it is inevitable!
I believe in you!
Share your story here if you want to be brave together!
