- Give yourself the grace to say “You know what? I’m just being right now.”
- Instead of “I should be” give yourself permission to just be
- There isn’t a right answer, there’s just your answer
- Know your family and what they need
- There are so many things we can’t control but what we can control is how we talk to and treat ourselves
The following is a full transcript of a Facebook Live, where Susie is speaking extemporaneously – she is unscripted and unedited.
Okay. Take two. Sorry folks. Sorry folks for a couple of things. First of all, I’m later today than I was every other day this week because I’ve been in meetings all day and I forgot to post that I was going to do this later today. So I apologize for that. Want to hop on here every day and just offer some encouragement in the midst of all that we’re going through because these are tough times and, but we are tough people and we’re going to be able to get through this. I wanted to talk today about two things. Most of all, us, you, your better relationship with yourself in the midst of this because we’re doing all of this about better relationships. And so if you hi Jamie. I actually tried yesterday to do the video and these people, you people pop on and I want to say hi and it interrupts my flow and then the recording is not good.
So I’m going to say hi at the beginning. I’m going to wave a few, come on because I really do want to just give a couple minutes of some encouragement, and then we can chat in the comments. So here’s the thing, I feel like this is a message I’m hearing from everyone I’m talking to right now and that is this pressure to be productive, pressure to do and use this time in certain ways. And if I want to offer you anything, it’s this permission slip. Let me write it out here for all of you and an RX for permission to be wherever you are right now. For some people being at home and being online and being sheltering in place, even with their work has not meant anything more than a busier life. Figuring out how to do things online, figuring out how to work and do kids and spouses and life all at the same time in the same place.
And there’s no margin and there’s no extra energy and there’s no extra time and there’s this feeling of they should be doing more. And so I talked with some folks about that yesterday. I have other clients who are not working and their life has gotten crazy. Maybe with kids being home or their jobs been put on hiatus and there’s economic worries and there is this idea of I should be productive, but I’m really feeling down or I’m really feeling, you know, this Malays and I think what we’re all feeling is a sense of grief, which is very real. And we’re going to talk about that as the days and weeks unfold. But what I want to tell everyone is you have permission to just be, to be where you are. There are no shoulds. There just is. And so don’t should all over yourself.
I should be doing this. I should be feeling that. I should be. Fill in the blank and, and tell yourself, Susie says, I have permission to just be, and that could be that for you. Just recharging or having some margin is about when you’re done with the day. You know, having some time watching Netflix and unplugging, reading a book of fiction, not doing work. I’m not being productive, not cooking from scratch, not painting a room, not cleaning out your closets, not doing all the things that you see people doing that caused you to feel like, Oh, I should be doing more. If that’s the case, then give yourself the grace to say, you know what? I’m just being right now. I’ve gotten through my musts. What am I urgency and importance that I have to take care of today with work, with kids, with relationships, and then what am I going to do now that’s going to recharge me?
And there is no right answer. There’s just your answer. And then if you’re the kind of folks that you’re kind of vibrating with energy and you can’t stand the containment and, and margin for you is, is cleaning out your closet and margin for you is painting a new room or taking on a new project, that’s okay too. There is no right way to be. There just is. There’s where you are and what you’re dealing with today. The things that I would challenge you to do is be very gracious with yourself to name what’s happening and to be okay with the struggle and to be gracious and let whatever you need today be the right thing for you today. It might be different tomorrow, it might be different for the people in your life. You know, productivity might be your spouse’s way of dealing with crisis and you can’t, you know, stop that or take that on for yourself.
You know, one of your kids might be, you know, wanting to bounce off the walls and go outside and need to run around and one of your kids might just want to be reading and hanging out and doing, you know, video games or hiding in their room. It’s okay. What I want to say to you is it’s okay. Know yourself, know your kids, know your spouse and let what they need. Let what you need be enough for today. It’s so important to do that. The other thing I really want to challenge you on, and I was reading in my devotional time this morning was this idea of peace. We are struggling with uncertainty. We don’t know and there is this peace that God brings it only God brings it. I really want to invite you to, and that is, you know I was reading about when Jesus came back to see the disciples after the resurrection and the very first thing he said to them was, peace be with you.
My peace be with you. And then this devotional time this morning, the idea was we can’t figure it out. We can’t manufacture peace. We can’t make it happen. We can’t, Oh, I’m just going to be peaceful, but we can’t invite God to come in and give us his peace. And so that piece is available to you. That piece, if you’re doing a project, that piece, if you’re sitting on the sofa and being what you would call nonproductive, I would invite you to call that piece recharging. I’m recharging by hanging out and doing nothing because that’s how my body and brain need to recharge right now. It’s so important that we take care of ourselves in these ways and that God’s peace can come into that place and give us a rest. That is, I’m not in control. And I think we’re all struggling with all the things we can’t control.
And that’s okay. What you can control is how you talk to yourself, how you care for yourself, how you engage with your own story you’re telling yourself. And I’m so grateful all of you are on here, Kevin and Sue and Karen and Brandon and John, thank you for being on today and I would love to hear in the comments something that you do to recharge. How are you recharging in the midst of this time? You know, what are some, and there’s no bad answer. It could be, you know what? I sit on the sofa with some ice cream and I watched Jimmy Kimmel from his home. I sit and outside and I read or I do seven projects and let my kids and my husband do what they want. There’s no right answer. There’s just your answer. And so tell me in the comments below what you do to recharge what you’re doing in this time to take care of yourself, to get out of the should mode.
And just the I am being mode because that’s such an important place for us to find, rest and build a better relationship with ourselves during this time, during this crisis time that’s going to help us be better for our people, be more engaged with our faith and honestly be more patient with ourselves, our spouses, our kiddos, our coworkers in this time of uncertainty. So one of the things I do to recharge as I read fiction. If you have any great books, I love to hear about him. Another way I recharge is I watch some Netflix cause it turns my brain off. And right now it’s not a Netflix, it’s on Amazon Prime. I’m watching the show called the Newsroom and it’s an older show and it’s just, the engaging dialogue is interesting to me. So how do you recharge? Sometimes I go for a walk with the hub, the hubby’s, the hubs down the street to watch the sunset.
You know, my daughter the other day called, I see Bob said he watches kids movies. Yes. She was like, mama, I’m watching the old movies. I watched three men and a baby and it was just this delightful kind of conversation about remembering when we watched it when she was younger. So the point here is find a way to recharge. Give yourself permission or if not here, I’ll write you a note, text me in the comments. I need a note from Susie. I will write you a note that says permission to recharge in any way you need because self-care is so important right now. And then finally, my prayer for each of you is that you find moments to just soak in God’s peace, to soak in God’s peace because Jesus says, my peace, I give you my peace I leave with you. And honestly, folks, when I don’t have peace, I’m so grateful that I can get God’s peace.
And sometimes it’s just going, I trust you for your peace today. Today, Jesus, bring your peace over this moment. Cause my mind is racing and my body’s vibrating and I’m not sure what to do. That is what I want to leave you with today. That’s how we create better relationships, better relationships with ourselves. Thanks for tuning in late for your grace about being off time and I will see you tomorrow again, if there’s anything I can cover that would help you questions comments below, or if you want them to be private, you can PM me and I will talk to you tomorrow. We will get through this together. Thanks, friends.