12686-Father-And-DaughterI give up… I am going to stop trying to get it right, and start being… present, authentic, me.

As a work in progress this is the most gentle and loving response to a God who says, “I made you for my delight, I love you and long to be in relationship with you… so much so that I paid the ultimate price.  I died for our relationship.


We fight against that utter unbelievable almost inconceivable gift. We flee from the tension that comes in knowing we don’t deserve it.  We hide in thinking, “I’m not worthy.”

At one level we aren’t-  in the column of “did it right, sinless, earned the reward,” – we get a big fat Zero!  But in the column of “Beloved, set apart, fearfuly and wonderfully made, God’s girl,”  we get gold stars and 100% all the time!

Today’s post for She Reads Truth reminded me of the times I cross my name off the list, because I don’t think I am worthy, because I am caught looking at my failures and sin.

And then I realize I am worthy because God says I am as His precious child.  You and I are worthy Jesus died so my name, so your name, would be on the list forever.. the list of forgiven, saved by the blood of Jesus.

It isn’t about earning, proving, doing… It is all about be-ing.

Being grateful, in need of forgiveness, and washed clean by what Jesus did, not what I do or don’t do.

Doesn’t that truth make you relax a bit ?  My shoulders dropped as I wrote those words and a big sigh escaped my lips… just knowing that is restful.

The question is will I leave my name on the list and stop trying to earn my place there?

Scrambling to be “good” was my M.O. for a long time. It is exhausting and futile.  because I failed at being perfect.

Can you relate?

We trick ourselves into thinking we can add something to the cross as payment, like Jesus’ blood wasn’t enough.  We can’t add a thing!  We can only receive.

Freedom comes when we stop trying and receive.  That is all God asks of us.. To Believe and Receive.  And then live from that place of belonging and forgiveness that will lead us to respond in love.

Are you tempted to cross your name off the list at times?  If so, why?

How do you remind yourself of the truth- Believe and Receive are all God asks and stop striving to earn what is freely given?

2 Responses to “Are you on the list?”

  1. Linda

    Sometimes I want to get it all right, to have all the answers, to deliver as I practiced, to handle every conflict calmly and constructively, to always have a good hair day with no dry, red splotches on my face or allergy eyes and nose, to match perfectly. And on and on and on and on…..
    When I was younger and so much smarter, I was sure I could do all those things and more if I just kept working harder, was totally engaged, drove myself just a bit more. The result? A broken thyroid followed by two years of bi-polar like behaviors. Sometimes sleeping 20 hours a day and other times up for days on end. How exhausting. How ineffective. How humbling.
    Older now, and not so smart, I still want, but I don’t need to get it all right, etc.
    It is enough to be.

    • Susie Miller

      “it is enough to be!” Oh wise one!! this is truer than true! Why does it take so long for us to realize let alone embrace this truth. I struggle still with giving grace to myself and allowing “Be-ing” to be enough. Sometimes I think you read my mind!! Hugs!


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