Better Relationship Podcast Episode #014
From Boardroom to Bedroom w/ Lauran Star
Show Notes: (by R. Pumphrey)
Lauran Star talks candidly about leadership, empowering women, and being an entrepreneurial wife and mother. Lauran is a force of nature and a delightful guest! She believes that women are every bit as capable of being leaders, having been a member of the United States Armed Forces, a former VP of Sales for a Fortune 100 Company, and now an entrepreneur.
- Lauran’s leadership experience began in 1989 when she became a member of the United States Armed Forces. Lauran retired in 1998, when she married and started her family.
- Through Lauran’s years of working with Fortune 100 companies, she understands what women need to thrive both in business and at home.
- CEO of LS Consulting, a leadership development organization fostering continued growth for both women and the next generation.
- Lauran holds a Masters in Organizational Psychology and is an active member of the Global Speakers Federation.
- She has 3 children, including 2 twin girls, and is active in coaching girls’ sports leagues.
Lauran’s Kick-Off to Entrepreneurship
- After re-entering the workplace, Lauran realized she had changed, and her perspective on leadership had dramatically shifted.
- Being a wife, a mom, and a leader, Lauran realized a lot of women saw leadership as unattainable because they were women.
- Lauran started her business to foster and coach women in leadership, but she had an “A-Ha” moment and realized she needed to go beyond the leadership field to address deeper issues that hold women back.
- Lauran thinks we are too easy to blame others at times rather than take personal responsibility. Lauran calls herself the ‘kick in your pants’ we need.
On Being an Married with Business:
- Being an entrepreneurial wife definitely has its challenges.
- After having children, Lauran’s perspective went from masculine focused on attainment of quantity, i.e. higher salary to more feminine focused on attainment of quality).
- Both Lauran and Susie want more women to be open about how difficult and challenging the realities of being an entrepreneur, wife, and mother.
- Susie client’s often battle with the issue of “sharing their spouse with the business.” As an entrepreneur, our faces can just completely light up over new clients or business opportunities. Spouses can be jealous or feel like less of a priority.
- Being intentional with your relationship with your spouse is crucial to creating a strong marriage as a entrepreneur.
Juggling Boundaries Between Work and Home
- Lauran has visual reminders around her office of what’s important OUTSIDE of her office. Example: bulletin board with nothing but family pictures-no matter where she is she can always see. It’s a subtle reminder that there’s more to her life than just her work.
- Lauran works on being fully present at home OR present at work.
- She has a sign on the outside of her door for when she’s working and a sign on the inside reminding her that when she leaves the office, all work must stay there.
- When her husband sends a quick email while she’s working, she writes it on a sticky note and it goes in the ‘family’ pile.
How To Open Up Dialogue on a Tough Issue-Perspectives from Susie and Lauran
- Susie believe that success in marriage requires discussion the difficult issues. The key element is learning how to have the tough conversations in a productive and effective manner.
- Susie coaches her clients to navigate the “heat of the moment” discussions and not escalate the conflict. She teaches skill to help you be direct but not accusatory, using “I feel” rather than “you did this.”
- Lauran takes “You” and “I” completely out of the equation and uses “we”-how can “we” solve this problem?
When Business Shifts Cause Marriage Shifts
- As entrepreneurs, we are constantly shifting our business.
- About 4-5 years ago, Lauran shifted her marketing campaign to: “From Boardroom to Bedroom.”
- Lauran’s husband was mortified that she was going to talk about sex and thought she’d alienate all of her leadership clients.
- She didn’t agree and ignored him which resulted in him thinking that she wasn’t valuing his input. They had to sit down and schedule a meeting with an agenda to discuss the pro’s and con’s.
- Having a discussion and hearing each others perspective, and giving weight to your spouse’s input regarding your business communicates respect.
- Lauran allows everyone around her to be who they are, because SHE is comfortable in her own skin.
Where to Find Lauran:
Lauran’s Website: www.lauranstar.com.
You can also connect to Lauran via social media through her site.
Lauran’s new book: “Your Power Pivot”
Lauran’s other books are available at: http://lauranstar.com/books
Susie’s website: www.susiemiller.com
Susie’s book: www.listenlearnlovebook.com