Better Relationship Podcast Episode #024
Success in Business & Marriage with Dino Watt
Show Notes: (by R. Pumphrey)
Can you use the same communication skills to win at marriage and business? Yes! Does having better relationships enrich your entire life? Yes! Dino Watt, of The Biz of Marriage, talks to Susie today about bridging the gap between personal and professional communication skills and how a ‘lost’ opportunity spurred him on to record-breaking entrepreneurial success!
- Dino is the #1 international best-selling author of ‘The Practice Rx’
- Dino is a relationship expert who helps couples have a ‘rockin’ marriage, as well as coaches business owners improve their team communications.
- Dino’s mission is to help entrepreneurs find happiness and fulfilment by building a culture of success in their professional and personal lives.
- Dino and his wife Shannon are celebrating their 21st wedding anniversary this year and have 3 teenage children.
- Dino believes that everything we want in life comes from our relationships that we have. When we focus on better relationships, we have ‘more’ of everything.
The ‘Seasons’ of Marriage
- Many couples do not focus on understanding the different ‘seasons’ within a marriage.
- Having 3 toddlers in the house at one time is a completely different experience than when all 3 children are teenagers.
- A couple can view being ‘empty nesters’, as being “all alone” or they can look at it like an opportunity to explore different paths.
- It’s about being in love with your spouse through all of the experiences in different phases of your marriage.
Challenges of Being an Entre-spouse
- There have been times that Dino has felt a lot of pressure in his business, because as the only income provider in his family. There is nothing to fall back on financially.
- This has caused personal stress, as well as stress on the marriage, because there were times he wished it wasn’t ‘all’ on him.
- Dino feels blessed because, although his wife chooses not be in the business, she has an amazing entrepreneurial and creative mind.
- However, this can sometimes cause conflict because if they don’t agree on something regarding the business, he realizes he can get defensive and feel ‘critiqued.’
- What has helped them work through this is a sort of ‘role reversal’ where Dino ‘shares business issues with Shannon, with an understanding she will listen and not “fix them.” This practice has helped their communication because they both know where they stand in the conversation.
A Pivotal Point
- About 2 years ago, Dino was presented with an opportunity that would generate significant income, but also would take up a significant part of the time he wanted to spend with his family.
- It wasn’t in his heart to do it but Dino pursued it because his wife felt it was the right thing to do for financial security.
- In the end, the company could not meet his requirements and rescinded their offer. In his wife’s mind, Dino had ‘lost’ that job and the security it brought.
- But, this turn of events fuels a greater passion in Dino to prove that the path he was on was the ‘right’ one.
- Over the last 2 years, they’ve had the highest revenue in the lifespan of their entire marriage.
Business Is Like Another Marriage
- A lot of the business owners face-especially smaller business owners- arise because they don’t have the management team with good communication skills.
- People are individuals and different roles requires unique approaches to communication in order to help everyone achieve their best and feel valued.
- A true relationship is give and take, patience and time, and having the other person see your genuine interest in building a relationship with them.
- You have to do that in your personal life and your business. The prevailing mindset in business is to want something RIGHT NOW. But, you can’t build relationships by ordering people around.
- When you understand how to build genuine relationships, you can really have whatever you want and people want to work with you
Juggling Work and Family
- Dino set up his business in a way that he controls the time; he is not at the ‘beck and call’ of his clients
- Dino took a cue from Ari Meisel’s podcast, Less Doing More Living, to understand and embrace his own ‘time clock’-i.e. when he works at his best
- It comes down to being intentional and owning his schedule, instead of letting his business own his schedule.
- Dino is also very in tune with his children and what is important to them. Dino makes certain activities a priority based on the conversations he has with his children.
- Working at home gives him the opportunity to spend more time with his wife
- Dino also pays attention to Shannon’s ‘clock’ and knows when she needs time away. They also know each other’s intimacy schedule or time clock.
- Many couples don’t ask for what they need emotionally. Dino and Shannon ‘speak up’ and voice their needs, wants and feelings, instead of just taking for granted that the other person is ‘okay.’
- Emotional currencies shift during a marriage so they are both committee to communicating their needs.
Who Does The Relationship Expert Take Advice From?
- Dino pays close attention to the challenges going on his client’s life so that he can ‘take notes’ for himself when/if similar issues arise.
- Dino is very deliberate about relating everything he can, from books, podcasts, etc., back to his own life and marriage.
What Would He Tell His Younger Self?
- Do the work. Invest the time.
- Slow down and spend more time soaking in every moment.
Where You Can Find Dino
His website: www.thebizofmarriage.com
While you’re there, get his free e-book, ‘The Relationship Slope’
Additional Links and Resources from this Episode
The Outliers: The Story of Success (Malcolm Gladwell)
Ari Meisel, ‘Less Doing, More Living’
Susie’s website: www.susiemiller.com
Susie’s book: www.listenlearnlovebook.com