Better Relationship Podcast Episode #037
A View from the Top with Aaron Walker
Show Notes: (by R. Pumphrey)
Aaron Walker, of A View from the Top, has a wealth of experience creating success in both business and marriage, which he uses to help other men accomplish their goals and dreams. Aaron views relationships as the most valuable asset in pursuit of success and significance. Aaron shares about the importance of timing conversations wisely, the value of accountability, and what it really means to live and work with intention.
- Aaron is a businessman and life coach, inspiring many through his leadership, mentorship and pursuit of excellence.
- Aaron’s mastermind group for men, View From the Top, helps men create a life of success and significance, through building strong relationships in marriage and business.
- Aaron has been married to his wife, Robin, for 36 years and they have 2 daughters, Brooke and Holly, as well as 5 grandchildren.
- Aaron and Robin started their first business at 18, selling it at just 27 years old to a Fortune 500 company.
- Through the years, Aaron started and successfully ran 8 businesses before retiring at age 50.
- After retirement, he was encouraged by his mastermind members to start coaching.
- Aaron is having more fun now with View from the Top then he did running all 8 businesses!
Challenges of Being an Entre-Spouse
- Robin, Aaron’s wife, is a tremendous partner, support, and advocate.
- Aaron gives everything his all. Robin is his ‘guardrail’ that keeps him from working too much.
- Aaron views the underlying tension in our life of juggling relationships and business endeavors, and helps men use this tension to their benefit.
- Embracing the tension between investing energy at work or at home more, means you are consciously trying to do the right thing.
Inviting Open Dialogue
- Anger doesn’t change anything. Holding it inside will result in a ‘blow up’.
- Aaron encourages men to wisely time when they have hard conversations, suggesting waiting till you are relaxed vs immediately.
- Aaron invites and encourages open discussions and feedback within his family.
- Accountability and openness are key to creating strong relationships. It’s not about fighting to win, but to resolve.
- Other people don’t see you as you see yourself-you have to look for their perspective.
Timing is Everything
- The most important thing we can do in our relationships is to set boundaries.
- Robin used bring up issues at bedtime, which would get Aaron riled up, so they agreed that no problems are discussed in bed.
- Robin gave Aaron 30 minutes of down time right after work to transition from business to home.
- Aaron makings quick decisions in business and life. However, Robin takes more time to decide, thus he’s learned to slowly tell her about the ‘big’ things.
- When Aaron thinks something will be difficult to discuss with Robin, he takes it to his accountability group first.
- Oftentimes it gets squelched at that point because his advisors point out something he hadn’t considered.
- When he does go to Robin, he opens with “this may be controversial” before jumping in.
Insights For Wives of Entrepreneurs and Executives
- Too many men invest in their work and not their marriage; wives can help them shift their focus.
- Men want to be acknowledged and affirmed by their mate.
- When wives are not ‘on board’, it kills their husbands’ spirits.
- Showing interest doesn’t mean you have to hammer them with questions, but giving them space to be excited and be the hero of their own stories.
- Telling your husband that you’re proud of him, means the absolute world to them.
Building Relationships in Business
- Your #1 asset is your intentionality about building relationships, whatever the type of business.
- Like marriage, you need to be intentional about communication and be a giver.
- Aaron uses letters of affirmation, brings clients donuts or coffee, and makes a simple phone call to build strong relationships.
- When reaching out to clients, don’t ask for a favor before ‘signing off’ from the conversation.
You Have to Date Your Spouse
- Throughout his entire marriage, Aaron continued to date his wife.
- Heart-felt gestures don’t even have to cost anything, such as writing short ‘I Love You’ notes.
- Consistently showing your wife love, makes communication a lot easier.
- And, when the difficult things come up, you’ve made a lot of deposits.
His Community-View From the Top
- The Community launched just a few months ago, Aaron shares insights from 36 years of marriage and business.
- Aaron does a live weekly webinar as well as facilitates discussions and answers questions personally.
- The Community already has several hundred members from around the world.
- Success is empty when making money comes at the expense of your family.
- Aaron encourages his clients to ask themselves “What do I want?” in life and business planning.
- We spend our lives seeking material things that don’t give us the happiness we expect because happiness is a choice, not a trait.
- To live a life of intention, we need to devise a plan and intentionally move towards making it happen.
- If you are haphazard, don’t have a system, or don’t write anything down, you won’t have much success reaching goals.
Where You Can Find Aaron
- For your free ‘Personal Assessment’, ‘What do I Want?’ and ‘Steps to a Productive Day’ worksheets, go to www.viewfromthetop.com/betterrelationships
Susie’s website: www.susiemiller.com
Susie’s book: www.listenlearnlovebook.com